Magazine Posts

When I think of all the tomorrows,
which I will never see,
I'll recall all of the memories,
of places we used to be.

The most important changes
which I can think to say,
don't leave without a goodbye,
it's not good for you or me.

An old sentiment,
is still here today,
as I think of you,
when you went away.

You were my light,
my shining star,
as I miss you so,
from now afar.

Whispered breath, rustles the air,
while the warmth of her body,
makes me aware,
of the love I have lost,
who is no more.

No more to be with me,
when I need her advice,
no more to talk with,
telling her she's nice.

Oh what a loss,
after, all of these years,
to end in a sadness
and the shedding of tears.

I have been struggling with
establishing my boundaries,
at the risk of offending others.

I am a private person,
unlike the one, you may see.
I don't care to be fussed over.
I need my own space, if I am
to deal with all I face.

I have friends, who recognize this.
Thank you. Unfortunately, there
are others, who with good intentions,
but not what I need.

Thank you all for the best wishes.
It will be what it will be.

Sitting in my chair,
staring out the window.
Looking at the ceiling,
pondering what is the next step,
during this crazy life's journey..

I have Stage 4, Pancreatic Cancer,
with perhaps, months to live.
How did I get in this mess?

My Oncologist does not want
to shorten my quality of life.
Neither do I, so there will not be
any Chemo or Radiation.
I am ok with that. It will allow
me to say farewell to my friends.

I do not plan on giving up. I will fight
this disease for as long as I can.
In the interim, I will enjoy my life,
to the fullest.

A story, from long ago,
of how words, will start to flow,
from this mind, likes to craze,
about a word used for days.

When love was blind,
you moved away.
There was no notice
and I had to pray,

About where you were.
No one spoke, they wouldn't say,
of why you left,
and moved away.

You did not say farewell,
leaving me alone, another day.
Dementia, its ugly face,
took your soul far away.

Now I sit,
trying to recall,
the sweetest memories.
We had it all.

There is nothing in this world,
I wouldn't do for you.
A compulsion, perhaps,
but it's what I do.

You are the person,
I find to be true.
Oh, how I wish, again,
I could be talking to you.

Sliding into depression,
day by day.
I know the reason,
but I won't say.

A personal matter,
one who I thought as a friend,
will not reply to my query,
or has it become a "Let's Pretend?"

Have I offended you,
did I misbehave,
or was it another reason,
making the situation, grave?

There are moments,
like right now,
where I'll revert to lies.
I'll avoid the truth, somehow.

I feel exhausted,
dead tired at the time,
when I feel,
I'm running out of time.

I am, of course,
it's plain to see,
for no matter the courage,
the future I see.

I won't drag my blanket,
it's not who I be.
I will stay strong to others,
it's what they'll expect of me.

When life,
goes awry.
When you're told,
you are about to die.

Not this instant,
but a few months from now.
Not the method,
nor the how.

How is your mind
supposed to process,
when the uncertainties,
of living under duress.

Should I have quit,
or give up the chase?
Not on my watch.
It's my life, not a race.

Silence is golden,
so I've been told,
while others profess,
their sadness, as life does unfold.

Sometimes,
I would like to say,
put a sock in it,
you're not helping my day.

We all have our worries,
you're not the only one.
so would you allow us to grieve,
until we are done?