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I stuck out my foot,
reaching for the stair.
I missed the step,
for it was not there.
It should have been solid,
but now I'm in the air.
A thought entered my head,
find something soft,
to avoid being dead.
As luck would have it,
there was a large bush,
and I fell in the middle,
right on my tush..

A Comment by Loy

Your avatar
Loy • 10/04/2022 at 11:06PM • Like 1 Profile

Good humorous poem! Glad you clarified this is fiction 😊.

Chauncey Mitchell Depew (1834 – 1928) was an American lawyer, businessman, attorney and politician. He served for two terms as United States Senator from New York and was well know for his wit and as an orator and after dinner speaker. He did work for Cornelius Vanderbilt, as an attorney and as president of the New York Central Railroad System. Read more  

Grab

Posted by MFish Profile 09/27/22 at 04:55AM Share Humor See more by MFish

Grab word bundles,
completing a task.
Nothing to say,
but since you ask.

I'll tell you a story,
one about self
and the adventures of
The Elf on the Shelf.

Late at night
he went creeping,
when all humans
were fast sleeping.

He scurried about
room to room,
without a worry
of impending doom.

Then in wee morning,
before early light,
set in a different location
then the last night.

So you don’t like your job, probably hate your boss, think you should be paid more for all the hard work and overtime you put in, maybe your co-workers look like mindless drones these days and retirement seems a lifetime away (it is!) … but quitting isn’t an option, not when you would lose your health care and your apartment, the apartment that already costs more than you can believe.  What’s a person to do?

Well, apparently, quit in place.  Stop killing yourself.  Stop sucking up to your boss.  Refuse to take overtime.  Slow down, relax, daydream a bit, take a long lunch break, sneak a joint in the john.  It’s a brand new workplace.  The go-go years have gone gone gone, good riddance.  The company treats you like a robot, act like one.  One pace, steady and slow as she goes. Do as little as possible, same as they would do for you.  They’re no longer loyal to you employees, why be loyal to them?  This is the New Work Ethic.  Congratulations and welcome to your new cubicle.

Personally, I always believed in Quitting.  Seemed like a good strategy.  Course, apartments didn’t cost an arm and a leg back then and health insurance wasn’t in the cards.  Pensions, 401-K’s, fergettaboutit.  I was part of the gig economy decades before it had a name and by the time it did, I was self-exiled to the South End where employment was marginal to non-existent.  So I did what the rest of us layabouts did down here, worked for myself.  Sure, the boss was a jerk, but that’s the joy of self-employment, you can look him in the eye and tell him to go to hell.  Won’t affect your wages one iota.  And end of the day you can have a beer or two together, gripe about the same issues, maybe decide neither of you will work the next day.

I recommend it.  But quitting in place.  I dunno.  Seems like the days would just be interminable, slowing down, dragging feet, avoiding work.  You like that kind of job, maybe be a traffic sign holder, SLOW, STOP, for a construction company.  Hours like years, days like a lifetime.  Personally I like to work if I’m going to work, put a back into it, feel like it was worth the effort.  Time flies even when it’s not much fun.  But … don’t say you heard it from me.  And whatever you do, don’t tell my boss.

The Skeeter Daddle Diaries

Ever since I was young, competing to earn a spot on my high school’s freshman track team, I have regularly exercised. So much so that when I was 35, I even competed in the New York City Marathon. I say I “competed” because that sounds much more impressive than “I jogged and walked” and gives the impression I might have stood a chance of winning. Alas, I came in 5,217th – barely overtaken by the other 5,216 runners ahead of me..... Read more

Long the Curls

Posted by MFish Profile 08/21/22 at 10:32PM Share Humor See more by MFish

Long were the curls,
on the nape
of the neck.
Brown, the color
with golden fleck.
Wind swept back,
as she ran by.
It was then
I caught her eye.
Where goes thou,
oh, beautiful one?
May I tag along,
as our day is done?
"Leave me alone,
old man, please
let me be."
'I'll do what I can,
it won't be with thee."

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