Magazine Posts

I have been living with my wife at a memory care facility since the middle of May. She has been diagnosed with Advanced Vascular Dementia-Alzheimer disease. I am with her 24 7's. I try to participate in all activities, with her so she will also be active. One such activity is a Sing along. I will sing with her old tunes,
such as, "When you wore a tulip, a bright yellow tulip and I wore a big red rose." These words are locked
in my brain and it has been difficult for me to hear other words. this early morning, I awoke with the following running in my head. Sorry but please bear with me as I attempt to clear the cobwebs of confusion.

Alfadore,
sat on the floor,
trying to look at ease.
I won't say anymore,
for I know I must appease,
the girl next door,
who lives under the floor
of my apartment
beneath the trees.
Give me a break,
it was my mistake
and shouldn't be all
of which you know,
for my life is quite good,
please be understood,
I am not rolling in dough.
Do you have much money,
he said to his honey,
down where the green grass grows,
for if you don't,
I most surely won't
stay and be waiting for you.

NASA Astronomy Picture of the Day:

Big, beautiful spiral galaxy NGC 7331 is often touted as an analog to our own Milky Way. About 50 million light-years distant in the northern constellation Pegasus, NGC 7331 was recognized early on as a spiral nebula and is actually one of the brighter galaxies not included in Charles Messier's famous 18th century catalog. Since the galaxy's disk is inclined to our line-of-sight, long telescopic exposures often result in an image that evokes a strong sense of depth. This Hubble Space Telescope close-up spans some 40,000 light-years. The galaxy's magnificent spiral arms feature dark obscuring dust lanes, bright bluish clusters of massive young stars, and the telltale reddish glow of active star forming regions. The bright yellowish central regions harbor populations of older, cooler stars. Like the Milky Way, a supermassive black hole lies at the core of spiral galaxy NGC 7331.

Forever the mountains.
Forever the day.
Forever my love,
Forever I'll stay.

Why am I so angry,
why am I upset?
What has upset me,
which I won't forget?

I know she sees me,
I am aware she doesn't know,
about our memories of love,
so many years ago.
Why am I angry and low,
I know she has no control.

It's a great life,
if you don't weaken.
Stay strong, you are
most important to all
your friends and family.
Be who you are,
not what others want
you to be.

Blue, the sky,
far above thee.
Life's the Sun,
wait for me.

Love me tomorrow,
Love me today,
Love is the message,
Love's what I say.

A whining word
Is now heard.
Another morning
Of being absurd.

NASA Astronomy Picture of the Day:

While drifting through the cosmos, a magnificent interstellar dust cloud became sculpted by stellar winds and radiation to assume a recognizable shape. Fittingly named the Horsehead Nebula, it is embedded in the vast and complex Orion Nebula (M42). A potentially rewarding but difficult object to view personally with a small telescope, the featured gorgeously detailed image was taken in infrared light by the orbiting Hubble Space Telescope. The dark molecular cloud, roughly 1,500 light years distant, is cataloged as Barnard 33 and is seen above primarily because it is backlit by the nearby massive star Sigma Orionis. The Horsehead Nebula will slowly shift its apparent shape over the next few million years and will eventually be destroyed by high energy starlight. Your Sky Surprise: What picture did APOD feature on your birthday? (post 1995)

It's not important
who wins this game,
but who survives,
without blame.
Don't tell me to relax.
Don't tell me to take a break.
You don't see the pain
in her eyes, when I return
after being gone.
Sorry, but I choose
not to see those eyes
filled with emotions
because she is afraid
of being abandoned.
I am not trying to be
a hero. I just want to
fulfill our marriage vows.
Call me foolish,
call me dumb,
it is alright.

Ashes, live embers,
alongside of you,
as old growth timber,
is no longer in view.

I cry, in darkest night,
my wife by my side.
She's asleep.
I realize each day I am
with her, is the best
day it will ever be.
I see her fade
daily to a point
she can no longer
function by herself.
An Independent, self-reliant,
strong woman, who has lost
capability. Sadness,
a word which doesn't adequately
describe, what has happened to her.