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Posted by MFish

I see my love, every day.
We talk about when she
was having radiation and chemo,
for treatment of lung cancer.
The good news; Cancer is in remission,
Bad news, early onset dementia.
I believe this was triggered by
or accelerated by the chemo treatment.
We saw that early, when she
couldn't remember our anniversary
and she was unable to balance
the checkbook or pay bills.
Her mother had dementia, in her late 80's.
I am seeing similar behavior
in my love. She can't remember names
or the names of objects. She does remember
one name and that is our Granddaughter.
Confuses the names of our two sons
and our close friends.
She told me that she didn't know my name.
Evenings are the worst. There is a tendency to wander
or get in a discussion that is close to an argument.
Then I'll hear "Put me in a home.'
I tell her no, that's not going to happen.
There is no logic or reasoning present.
I'll talk to her and she won't hear me,
so I raise the volume of my voice and
then she tells me, "you don't need to shout.
Tonight, in the space of 10 minutes, she
asked me if it was raining. I replied No.
That upset her as she said, " you know I
can't hear.
Sorry for the whining.

What happens when your
mind starts to go?
When you no longer remember
all that you know
and everything in front
of you, has no name.
It's something you knew;
a simple instruction of put on
your slippers, when you arise,
is met with puzzlement and surprise.
When you look at a shirt on a chair
and say to me, "Is this it?"
At that moment, I have become aware
you know nothing of what I say.
So, I help you now to get
ready for another new day.

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